July 2, 2008
- Your company is experiencing a downward spiral
- Your relationship with your manager is damaged beyond repair
- Your life situation has changed
- Your values are at odds with the corporate culture
- You’ve stopped having fun and enjoying your job
- Your company is ethically challenged
- You have behaved in ways that are considered improper
- You’ve burned your bridges with your coworkers
- Your stress level is high at work and is affecting your physical/mental health
- You are unchallenged…
-This post was taken from a random email we received from a job search engine
Leave a Comment » | 
Blog, Random Nonsense | Tagged: activism, blog stuff, burnt out, carreer, carreer opportunity, Culture Jamming, earning a living, Ego Assassin, egoassassin.com, expenses, funny people, humor, life, look for new work, new job, new work, politics, satire, sick of gas prices, sick of jobs, sick of work, work comedy, work humor, working | 
Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
June 30, 2008
I don’t care how smooth or pleasant it sounds when peppering the term “thats a good question” into a conversation, I think it’s an overused and meaningless slogan. The bottom line is, so what if it is a “good question”. What does that mean anyways? It sounds to me like the filibuster coin phrase of all time that allows the person being asked a question to throw the audience off-guard while they conjure up some bullsh*t answer (or no answer at all except the phrase “that’s a good question” + blahblahblah).
Are we all turning into politicians these days? Who do we think we’re fooling? I mean, it’s bad enough that we rip each other off in every other aspect of life…do we need to treat each other like children too? This phrase is ridiculous and I’m sick of it.
Next time someone asks a difficult question that you can’t answer, just be honest and say “I don’t know”.
-From the Mind of the EgoAssassin
Leave a Comment » | 
Blog | Tagged: activism, corruption, culture jammers, Culture Jamming, ego, Ego Assassin, egoassassin.com, empty words, english words, filibuster, humor, i'm sick of it, idiot americans, idiotic people, jackball, jackballs, mainstream, mainstream sucks, meaningless talk, meaningless words, nonsense, politicians, positive change, ridiculous, routine, routine is stupid, satire, semantics, sick and tired, sick of it all, social change, social comedy, social justice, stupid phrases, stupid routines, stupid words, useless phrases, work jokes, work nonsense | 
Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
June 14, 2008
There are many decisions in life that some consider brave, such as skydiving, rock climbing, or bungee jumping, but I personally believe that the bravest decision a human being can make in life is marriage. Here are some reasons why I respect any soul who jumps into the “I do” situation:
1. Divorce rates seem to be approaching the 50% mark these days, so you’re truly living on the edge with this gamble.
2. All of the people I’ve met in life (including friends and family) are divorced or were divorced at some point…OR come from a divorced family. Think about it.
3. I can barely take care of myself, so I can’t imagine taking care of someone else for the next few decades….. (Well at least I admit it)
4. People getting married realize that they will lose all sense of fashion or even get dressed by their spouse.
5. Getting married means you often start shopping at places you would not regularly be seen dead in and you say really stupid stuff like “oh, that’s our favorite restaurant”.
6. You now have to answer to someone else when you want to go anywhere or see your friends or do anything at all. WHAT IS THAT?
7. You have another routine on top of the normal routine that you have worked all your pointless life to master.
8. Forever is a long time. (Use your imagination on this one)
In Summary: Good luck. But seriously kids, as sarcastic as it comes across, I do wish you the best. You are the bravest person on the planet if you get married, so never forget that.
Comments Off | 
Blog, Controversy Baby, Random Nonsense | Tagged: activism, brave, bride, broken home, college humor, comedy, comedy blog, culture, Culture Jamming, cynical, cynical humor, divorce, divorce rate, divorce stats, dork, Ego Assassin, ego blog, ego squash, egoassassin.com, family, fashion sense, favorite, forever married, getting married, good luck, humor, husband, marriage, marriage counseling, marriage jokes, marry, parents, sardonic, social issues, statistics, stupid stuff, why marry, wife, wife said, work humor | 
Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
June 1, 2008
What is the deal with these ridiculous scenes in the new Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull film, where Spielberg/Lucas feature computer animated gophers? (Okay they are actually Prairie Dogs, but you get the point) I wasn’t sure if I was watching Caddy Shack 4 or Indiana Jones 4. Are these “professional” film makers serious with this nonsense? Is there not one classic film that Hollywood will not destroy with this corny Jar-Jar Binks-esque garbage? I have two words for you: El Terrible.
Below is an image from the beginning scene of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (as the Paramount Mountain Logo transforms into this CGI Gopher). And not to spoil the film, but the gophers have absolutely nothing to do with the plot line or story. What a joke.
3 Comments | Blog, Random Nonsense | Tagged: activsm, bad movies, bootleg movies, caddy shack, change, crystal skull, Culture Jamming, Ego Assassin, ego assassin blog, egoassassin.com, epic films destroyed, films, george lucas, gopher, harrison ford, Hollywood, humor, imdb, indiana jones, indiana jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, indiana jones film, lucas and spielberg, lucas film, movie review, new films, new films suck, new movies are terrible, satire, social, stars, steven spielberg, steven spielbergo | Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
June 1, 2008
1. Banana
2. Hat
3. Hello
4. Tired
5. Line
6. Yogurt
7. System
8. Leather
9. Bolo Tie
10. F.Y.I.
And my personal favorite is “Leopold”.
-From the Mind of the EgoAssassin
Leave a Comment » | Blog, Random Nonsense | Tagged: baby names, child names, Culture Jamming, Ego Assassin, egoassassin, egoassassin.com, humor, jokes, names, poetry, satire, satirist, social humor | Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
May 27, 2008
Here is an exclusive peak at the real photo that no one wants you to see from the recent Mars landing. I noticed that there looks to be some kind of pole in the background, but that was the only odd thing about this image.
-The EgoAssassin
Comments Off | Blog, Random Nonsense, Social & Political Issues | Tagged: blog comedy, Culture Jamming, humor, mars exploration, mars landing, mars news, nasa, nasa explores, pheonix mars lander, satire, satire comedy, slap in the face, space travel, wasted money, yahoo mars search | Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
May 27, 2008
I’m sick of being expected to do the daily norms in society. In all of our human interactions and responses, we’re expected to act a certain way and follow the formalities. It is for this reason that I propose that instead of using the “shh” sound when wanting someone to be quiet, that we start hissing instead. Hissing as in the way cats do it. That would be pretty interesting and funny. Let’s do it. Who’s with me?
-From the Mind of the EgoAssassin
Comments Off | Blog, Random Nonsense | Tagged: animal comedy, cat face, cats, Culture Jamming, Ego Assassin, ego blog, egoassassin.com, felines, hiss, human hissing, humor, jokes, nonsense, satire | Permalink
Posted by egoassassin
Subscribe via RSS Feeds
