EgoAssassin.com - Music. Satire. Controversy.

This video is insane. I still have no clue what led up to this punch in the face, but some lady just clocked another lady with her fist and you can see the ladies entire face just cave in. This is unreal. Definitely my video of the week and a reason to write some fluff instead of my usual cynical, satirist topics.

Is there anything original that people can ask me on Monday mornings other than “what did you do this weekend?” It’s wearing thin on my nerves, especially since I go through these shenanigans every Friday and Monday without a break. On Friday afternoon I get the classic “So what ya’ doing this weekend?” And of course on Monday mornings (like clockwork) it’s the ever popular “so what DID you do this weekend?”. This wouldn’t bother me so much if the people asking me had anything else to say, but they never do!

My new answer is, please just shut up. Firstly, why do you care? Secondly, why ask me on Friday if you are just going to ask me again on Monday? Do you simply need a reason for me to ask what you did over the weekend or do you just have nothing better to ask? And by the way, why is the weekend any different than every other day of the week when it comes to “doing” something? I’m always doing something, so why is it so important all of the sudden to hear the details of my actions on any given weekend. If I already work with you every damn day, you probably know too much about me, so why is it necessary for you to know what I do on my days off?

Not to sound super negative, but I really, REALLY don’t care what anyone did over the weekend (unless it involves the revelation that it is pointless to keep asking about my weekend).

I’m about substance and constantly getting to know people, but sick of using this repetitious nonsense and fluff conversation to fill up space. Life is too short people. Ask me some real questions for f***s sake.

Back when I lived overseas, I’ll never forget this food joint sprung up next to my house that was a blatant rip off Carl’s Jr. (before the chain officially came to the Philippines). I was taking the bus to school one day and took a double-take out of the window when I noticed a bizarro logo that low and behold turned out to be real. The sign read “Charles Jr.” and along with it included a bootleg, yellow star face with a mustache and glasses on it. Hmm, looks familiar. HA-HA! So terrible. Most of my friends here in the U.S. still don’t believe that this is a true story, but it is. This “legit” restaurant existed for a few years in the city of Manila, on the island of Luzon, in the Philippines, but was eventually shut down once certain “legal” restrictions came into play. It must have been when I was like 9 or 10 years old, but if anyone remembers this, you have to contact me about it so we can laugh together.

So in honor of this bootleg moment, I recreated the logo as best I could as you will see in the low-fi paintbrush rendition here that took all of 3 minutes. Don’t ask me why I am bringing this up now, but it is still one of the funniest memories of my life. I would love to have a site dedicated to all of the fake, bootleg, knock-offs that are floating around on earth right now.

We are getting ripped off every day, that is a reality. And not only do we often accept being ripped off in life, but we smile in peoples faces when we are responsible for ripping them off too! We find every possible opportunity to rip each other off and make a profit on things we know to be worth-LESS.

We’re paying ridiculous prices for goods, services, and land. And who is making up the prices for the goods that we buy? I’m all about making a healthy profit and prospering as a society here, but come on now, don’t you ever get the feeling that gas stations aren’t the only places gouging the hell out of prices?

It seems to me that costs are often uneducated guesses that are constantly going up with little explanation as to why.

And what is this fascination with “club cards” at every damn grocery store I walk into. Oh I need the secret handshake in order to get the actual price for groceries now? What’s the point? I don’t get it. Every time they ask me I give them the same answer: NO I DON’T HAVE ONE AND DON’T WANT ONE. And they still give me the “discount”, which is code name for the “price we should be charging you anyways”. I seriously want to start my own “customer club card”, wherein each grocery store needs a serial coded, annoying, plastic card that will allow them to receive my valuable business at a reasonable cost.

I say again, we are getting ripped off and we waste time talking to each other about “big sales” and “discounts” we found in the newspaper. BLAHBLAH, BLAH. Stop wasting your time searching for deals, it is the same thing as Las Vegas, they will take you for every cent while you think you are actually winning something.

Ok that is all I have to say. I will get frustrated if I think any more on the topic. Time for me to go off and get ripped off.